Have you noticed that your boyfriend ignores you, pays less attention, does not give compliments, does not give flowers and does not call for a walk? No matter how painful it is, but there is a high probability that he just lost interest in you. We will tell you in this article how to make sure of this for sure and why this could happen. You will be able to analyze your behavior and use our advice to improve the situation for the better. The main thing is not to lose hope!
The attitude of a young man (hereinafter - MCH) can change even after he understands that you have a lot of shortcomings. Any little things can irritate him: talking quickly, smoking, laughing strangely, annoying you with your calls, raising your voice, etc. Claims can also be made about your appearance: according to his concepts, it turns out that you are not at all a slim girl, which you used to be were considered, and your chest is no longer large, and your hips are too wide, and it’s time to get rid of cellulite ...
The girl herself is also capable of provoking distance, for this very often it is enough for her to make just a few mistakes:
Also, do not forget about the importance of intimate relationships, if you have them. Maybe the guy is bored with the monotony, or he is tired of waiting, or you are no longer sexually attracted to him.
It is also likely that the guy could cool off if the girl just too attached to him. Men feel this, and such an attitude can only scare them and annoy them. In this case, try to relax and pay more attention to your loved one.
Naturally, if in your case there are only 1-3 signs, then you should not draw premature conclusions, perhaps your half has some kind of life difficulties. Therefore, it is best to ask her about it and make sure that this is the case.
If the guy says that everything is fine, try to talk to him frankly. Say that you do not like what is now, ask what could have contributed to this turn of events and what can be done to change the situation for the better. If a young man has cooled off towards you, but he still has some feelings somewhere inside, he will not mind the conversation. But if you see that it strains and irritates him, he begins to get nervous from the questions asked, leave immediately.
If you want to re-interest him, you need. What needs to be done for this? Read about this in our other article, which will help to give beauty to hair, hands, face.
You still don't understand? On this topic, we have collected a maximum of useful information in another article. It will help determine what the root of the problem is.
In order for his eyes to light up again, you need to change both externally and internally. If you hated reading before - get interested in literature, did not pay enough attention to yourself - sign up for a fitness club, were a bore - start visiting nightclubs with girlfriends.
The main goal of the transformation is for him to start praying for you, and not you for him.
Our tips on how to cope with the task will help. This article has 5 steps to follow carefully. This is the key to success!
First of all, be patient, it is very difficult to arouse repeated interest in the MCH, but it is possible. For this you cannot:
If you want to return the old feelings, do not openly demonstrate that you need a guy. It can only scare him and push him away even more. Instead, try to see each other as little as possible, but if there is an opportunity to do it on purpose, use it. At the same time, you need to look perfect, be cheerful, friendly, polite, as if you don’t care what he thinks of you. Believe me, it will work, because men hate indifference!
If you live in different cities and keep in touch only by correspondence or by phone, drop everything and go to him. Do not warn him before that, make it as if the purpose of the trip was not him, but, for example, an excursion, work, study, etc. When you are already there, offer to meet and look at his communication behavior. If it is as cold as it is at a distance, ask directly if nothing happened during your absence. An honest young man who respects you will certainly tell the truth.
If you can't see, try not to talk to him on the phone, do not call him first, answer every other time. He must understand that without him your life will be as rich as with him. If this does not work, and the young man stops communicating at all, the relationship can be considered completed. In this case, write him a message that, for example, you understand that you are no longer a couple, you are very sorry if you did something wrong, you would like to correct the situation, but obviously this is not necessary. At the end, wish him happiness so that he can find a more suitable girl. Believe me, even the most indifferent person will answer something like this.
Do you want to know all the secrets of seducing men? We advise you to look free video course Alexey Chernozem "12 laws of seduction for women". You will receive a 12-step step-by-step plan on how to drive any man crazy and keep his affection for years to come.
The video course is free. To watch, go to this page, leave your e-mail and you will receive an email with a link to the video.
If he still hasn’t kindled feelings for you, don’t torture yourself: let him go. To do this, just switch to your business - meet your girlfriends more often, go shopping, go in for sports, study, read books. Here you will find a selection. Try not to blame yourself, repeat to yourself that this is not your person and you are not on your way. Definitely needed. In this article, we will tell you how to do this with the help of meditation, sports and other activities.
Here is a video with some pretty sensible advice from a psychotherapist:
If necessary, meet another guy, spend time with him, go for walks and enjoy the freedom! And finally, remember, you will definitely meet the one who will always love you.
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Hello, dear forum users and forum users. I didn’t think that I would get to the point of asking for opinions and advice on the women’s forum, but the ways of the Lord are inscrutable) My problem is this: I met a girl at work. We work for the same company. I'm a lawyer, she's an engineer's assistant. I'm 35, she's 23. I'm Libra, she's Gemini) At first they just talked, then they started dating. She was not embarrassed by either our age difference or the fact that I had a child from a previous marriage (the son lives with his ex-wife, but we maintain relations with him). At first they just met, kissed, went to the cinema and to exhibitions. They discussed the work of Blok, Mandelstam, Yesenin, talked about the political situation in the country and the world. She is a smart, well-read girl and it is a pleasure to communicate with her. Despite the difference in age, we spoke the same language with her. On the fifth date, I invited her to my house, she agreed. We are both Muscovites, both live with our parents. After the divorce, I moved to my father's house and live with my mother, who at that time just went away for a few days to visit. When it came to intimacy, she answered with a soft but decisive refusal, citing the fact that too little time had passed. I accepted her decision, although I was very excited and we just went to bed. Although both did not fall asleep all night, they were in some kind of depressed state and just lay and talked. She said that she was serious about me and wanted an exceptionally serious relationship. In the morning, to my surprise, she herself took the initiative and we became close. Although the sex turned out to be somewhat crumpled: apparently, my nervous tension after the night of refusal and the fact that in the previous two days I had only slept 4 hours had an effect. But she was not embarrassed, she said that everything was fine and next time it would be better. For the rest of the day, she never left my side, there was a feeling of complete harmony and mutual understanding. She prepared food for me and, at my request, stayed with me for the second night. She voluntarily satisfied me orally, and we fell asleep, lying in an embrace. And in the morning (it was Monday), we went to work, appearing there with a small interval, so as not to "burn out". But the very next day everything changed: she stopped calling me, answered my calls, but in some official tone. This went on for a couple of days. At work, we work in different departments and practically do not intersect. One day I decided not to call her, she was also silent. Calling her the next day, I asked: "have we changed something?" . To which she replied that nothing had changed, she was just not in the mood. In communicating with me, I feel cold and a certain detachment, although this was not the case before. An interesting detail: earlier in one well-known social network, she practically did not sit, corresponded only with me when we could not see her or talk on the phone. But now she spends all her evenings there. During the last conversation, she wished me good night and said that she would go to bed, because. very tired. But her "fatigue" did not prevent her from spending another 3 hours online, despite the late hour. I called her today and asked her to meet up this weekend. She said that we might meet if there was time. although earlier she herself called and was interested when she could see me. It’s rather dreary at heart, because, to put it mildly, she is not indifferent to me. I will say more: I have not had such strong emotions and feelings for many years. I am interested in the opinion of members of the forum and especially members of the forum on this issue, because her behavior after two nights together is completely inexplicable for me. Thank you in advance.
Hello Maria! I really appreciate your help in my situation. Here is my story:
I've been dating my girlfriend for 19 months. We've known each other for 6 years but haven't been close. Both are 30 years old. She has a child (10 years old) from her first marriage (her husband died 5 years ago). I have not been married, no children. She lives with her parents and son in a nearby satellite town (25 km from mine). Works in my city (they have a service bus).
For the first six months of our relationship, everything was perfect: she herself reached out to me, talked about everything, often stayed overnight with me, was modest and economic. I felt that she loved me, and I loved her very much too. Our relationship was somewhat overshadowed by her bad habits: smoking and an indefatigable love of beer. I struggled with them as best I could, twice coded her from cigarettes, but she broke down. But gradually I began to notice some of her cooling towards me. She said that I got her with my correctness. Although I took care of her health, hoping that in the near future we will get married and have a baby. More and more quarrels began to occur, during which she threw the keys to my apartment and said that she would not come again. I have always been the first to reconcile, because I love her and cannot live without her. In one of these scandals, she left for three weeks. I was very worried, on my knees I asked to come back, I carried flowers several times a day. With difficulty persuaded, but since then she has become quite selfish. Thinks only of himself. You can’t wait for a kind word from her - only wishes in an orderly tone. A little something wrong - the keys on the table and leaves. And 90% of all my requests are answered NO. Finally, finally convinced - she quit and has not smoked for six months. But once a week she likes to relax - drink beer. One thing is bad - he does not know the measures (up to 3 liters per evening per 56 kg of body). In this state, he can say a lot of nasty things. Then he repents, but not for long.
Here we are again in a quarrel. It's been two weeks now.
I call, I persuade to make peace - she says: I do not want to renew our relationship. But my soul hurts: I love her very much and cannot live without her.
Tell me, please, how to establish relationships based on mutual love and respect?
Denis, N.Novgorod, Russia, 30 years old
Hello Denis.
First of all, you need to figure out exactly why such things happen to your girlfriend. Without this, it will be very difficult to take and just like that to establish relations, and perhaps even impossible. I will give you possible options for the reasons for her behavior, and you try, firstly, to think on your own and analyze what could happen to her, and, secondly, try to talk to her personally about this topic. So: 1) At some stage of your life together, her feelings for you could really change. “I fell out of love”, “something is gone”, “the feeling is gone” - all these are completely normal life phenomena. Today, there is interest and feelings, but after a while they pass, dissolve, and a person cannot name the reason - something just went away and that's it. With such a development of events, as a rule, the one who "fell out of love" has an aggressive attitude towards his partner. He begins to interfere with him, annoy, "get", strain, etc. Any of his requests are perceived with hostility, conversations burden, offers are uninteresting. If it is feelings that burn out, and the habit remains, then it is difficult for such a person to leave his partner at once, but life with him does not bring joy and satisfaction. Therefore, he can return to his partner, hoping that something will improve, but, having not received the necessary emotions and sensations, he again begins to get angry and react irritably to everything connected with this partner. 2) In what ways did you code your girlfriend? Sometimes some things can be very detrimental to the human body and psyche. How "tested" and authoritative specialists did this coding? If this is the introduction of some substances, this in its own way could affect the hormonal background of a woman, which is directly related to her emotional and mental state, with her mood. If it was hypnosis or something akin to it, it is not known how this affected her subconscious and personality structures. 3) Maybe everything is rather banal: Your lifestyle, claims against her, etc. just do not suit your girlfriend. Perhaps she is very tired mentally or physically and reinforces herself with such doping - cigarettes and alcohol. By depriving her of this “rest” and “pleasure,” you stumble upon the dissatisfaction of her needs and, accordingly, an aggressive attitude towards yourself. But in this case, you still need to “dig deeper” - what does this holiday with alcohol mean to her? Is it just rest and relaxation, a pleasant habit for her, or this critical need to get rid of some unpleasant emotions or fatigue, without which it is difficult to live. And if so, what are the problems? You can start to find out all this - try to "work as a psychologist." Be as friendly as possible, do not criticize her, just listen. Say that you understand her, and carefully ask if she wants something to change for the better, maybe it will still be more productive to get rid of some addictions - what does she think about this. Don’t persuade anymore, don’t explain how bad everything is, don’t read notations - you have already tried this and you will always have time to do it. Start LISTENING TO HER - just listen to her opinion, her views and not say anything against it. So you can better understand her, and at the same time she will see that she is accepted, and not pressured on her with demands. You write: “how to establish relationships based on mutual love and respect?” But how do you know for sure that she has love and respect for you? First of all, this is exactly what you need to find out - does she have feelings, is there respect, and WHY exactly does she not want to renew the relationship. If you meant the question: “how to return mutual love and respect?”, then there are no universal “recipes from a psychologist”, otherwise we would all live happily and not suffer from unrequited love. This is where you need to progressively analyze what was the root of your problems from HER point of view, listen, try to understand and accept, and gradually try to find some kind of compromise that suits both. Try to do this - and this will be the first step towards reconciliation and, possibly, building relationships. Good luck to you!
Sincerely, Pugacheva Maria.
